This article covers squirting during couple play, before you jump in we believe that you (the female partner) should already have squirted by yourself in order to have a good understanding of the techniques that get you there. Trying to figure this out for the first time with your partner is, in our opinion, a lot harder.
If you haven’t unlocked this as a woman, we’d recommend reading Lola’s guide on Solo Squirting:
Once you’ve managed to do it a couple of times by yourself, feel free to come back here to experiment with your partner!
Rules of the challenge
Step 1: Setup your environment so that it is “waterproof” or splash proof and comfortable
Step 2: For him, start with foreplay to awaken her g-spot (while stimulating the clitoris as well)
Step 3: Have penetrative sex, also adjusting angle to aiming for maximum G spot (or even just upper vagina wall) stimulation
Step 4: Come back to fingering the G spot + clit stimulation (with a toy if needed)
Step 5: You can go back and forth between penetration and fingering as many times as you want. Getting her body ready for squirting can take A LOT of time and continuous G Spot stimulation, switching back to fingering can be great as a guy if you feel you’re getting too close to orgasm.
What you need
A space that’s warm and comfortable.
Enough time to play and explore without being disturbed or rushed.
Stuff to keep the bed or couch dry: this can simply be a couple of towels (what we used in our video), or a waterproof blanket.
A comfortable setup, especially for her. Squirting requires full relaxation and can take a while, so get all the pillows and accessories to make yourself at ease.
A good lube is highly recommended. G spot fingering can mean quite a lot of friction for extended periods of time. Use lots of lube and reapply often (you’ll see James do just that in the video).
A clitoral stimulation toy if she needs it
Tips
The secret here is for her to communicate and guide him through the whole process. This what you’ll see us do in the video and we don’t think we would have achieved it otherwise. Every body is different. That’s why we suggested reading Lola’s Solo Squirting guide first and practicing by yourself. That way you can figure out exactly what kind of stimulation you need. In this scenario, it allows you to guide your partner almost as if it were your own hands. Once he’s learned the process you won’t have to do that anymore. But for figuring it out together this is the best advice we can give. In the video you’ll see just how much Lola is talking to me: “Deeper”, “Faster”, “More at the back”, “Stop, get your fingers out”, etc.
For him: Don’t think of the G-spot as one precise spot that’s located in exactly the same place in every woman. When we talk about the “G-spot” here, we’re really talking about stimulation of the upper vaginal wall. Where it feels best can vary a lot, so there’s no exact map to follow, take your time and explore together to find the right sensation for her.
For him: if you’re comfortable with light “dirty talk”, it can be great to give her encouragement and to tell her how much this turns you on.
Don’t put any pressure or expectations on the practice. The fact that we’re calling this a Couple Challenge doesn’t mean to succeed in your first attempt, we didn’t! This was a journey for us: first Lola discovered it by herself, then she couldn’t do it while I was fingering her but she could do it afterwards with the right toys, and now we’re at this stage. Lola can squirt if she gives me instructions as I finger her but we’re still trying to achieve that with penetration. All that to say, it’s a process! Be patient and enjoy the practice 😉
As always, if you’d like to watch the video of us trying this challenge, it’s available here:
Our setup: Lola is lying on her back, propped up with enough pillows to almost be sitting (her favorite position to achieve squirting). I’m in front of her which gives me easy access to pleasure her in different ways.
We start slow: kissing, undressing, more kissing. I then tease her and start going down on her. At some point, Lola asks me to put a finger inside. And I think this is where we unlocked the experience:
I had previously watched a couple of videos and tutorials on how to make your partner squirt and they describe this “come here” motion with your finger, done a few centimeters inside the vagina, on the upper wall, where you feel that rugged texture. I don’t know if I didn’t understand it right, or if different women have different bodies. But I was in the wrong spot. Like pretty far off. So after I put the finger inside and proceeded to apply the technique, Lola kept telling me to go deeper and to the back. By the time she was happy that I had found the right spot, it was completely different from what I had imagined: my finger was in almost all the way, to the point that if I didn’t have the right position I would almost struggle to hit that part with the tip of my finger. All of that to say that communication was essential. If she hadn’t explored her body by herself first to find that spot, or if she had but stayed quiet when I was using my fingers “incorrectly”, we might not have succeeded! And this is true for so many other sex practices. But back to what happened next.
What James loved
There are so many things I loved about this challenge.
First there’s the obvious pleasure and satisfaction of achieving something for the first time. Of course Lola is doing most of the achievement in this case, especially with how much guidance she gave me. But I still got that rush of “I was able to make my partner squirt”. It’s kind of stupid but it feels special because it’s not something anyone can do. To be clear, I have no proof, but I think all women can squirt. What I meant is that not everyone takes the time to explore and experiment to unlock that skill.
I guess it just makes me proud to see that, after 6 years together, we can still have “first times” in our sex life. And this is what our message is all about, this is what we want you to take away from this. Putting effort and time and care in your sex life, and trying new things, and failing and experimenting and all of that, is the secret to a happy sex life in a long term relationship. This squirting journey required us to be patient, to keep trying, to have fun and play, to communicate. And then you get this reward and it feels incredible.
So, without getting too deep, for me it’s now just Lola soaking me with Squirt or even an ego thing of “I’ve unlocked that”. It’s more about what it says about us as a couple and about our journey together.
What Lola loved
There are a few things I really love about this squirting challenge!
First of all, the sensation itself. As women, we get to experience so many different flavours of orgasm depending on where we get the stimulation: clitoral, cervical, “G-spot,” anal, a combination of everything, etc. It really is like different tastes of pleasure, and squirting is one of them. It feels so unique. Because of the intensity of it, but especially because of that huge release of tension afterwards, it’s really different from any other orgasm. And I think it’s pretty dope to get to explore the full spectrum of what your body is capable of.
To me, squirting at some point almost feels like a sort of self care (and I don’t wanna get to woo woo here) but to me it’s almost therapeutic, like all of the tension I’ve accumulated in my body over the previous days gets released and leaves with it.
I share this because I feel like sometimes women might want to try squirting mainly because it makes their partner turned on. And that’s really cool, but honestly, you might end up loving it way more than your partner does. I also think that approaching it out of curiosity for your own body gives you much more patience and motivation than simply trying to make it happen so he can enjoy the view.
But coming back to the reasons I loved the challenge, the second one is the vulnerability of letting your partner witness it and be part of the experience. You’re letting your partner see you completely let go. And to me it’s suuuuper intimate, because in order to squirt, I can’t be in control, thinking about how I look, or what sound I make and all that, because it’s all about letting go. It can be scary to invite someone in that space, but at the same time, for us, it is such a powerful way to create a deep and strong connection and complicity as a couple.
And finally, I LOVE how much this challenge forces constant communication from my side. In the rest of your sex life, I can sometimes get away without communicating that clearly and still have a very good time, but here I have to guide him the whole time, telling him exactly what I need, what feels good, what to change, or squirting won’t happen. And honestly, I think that’s such a golden skill to develop. Because he’s not inside my head!
We offer two courses: For Men and For Women.
Each course can be taken independently, but they were designed to complement one another. For the best results, we recommend that both partners take their respective version.
